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  • December 31, 2021

My Own Queer Proposal

Petite G custom ring with pink rose

My Own Queer Proposal

My Own Queer Proposal

Lei Bretón
Lei Bretón

Founder & Owner

  • Blog
  • December 31, 2021

Two years ago, I was sneaking over to Petite G Jewelers while my wife was photographing a New Year’s Eve wedding, to look at a diamond that had come in as part of some estate jewelry. Amanda wanted between half and one carat, east west emerald cut diamond, and this diamond was perfect! I really liked the idea that I didn’t have to buy a new diamond, we could re-design an heirloom, something I knew Amanda would really appreciate.

Lei proposing to Amanda. Amanda has a hand over her mouth
Lens: Rachel Rodgers Photography

I had a fabric show to go to in New York, and I asked Amanda to come with me. She told me about a friend of hers who’s also a photographer, Rachel, and suggested we grab a coffee with her. Once I realized that Petite G could turn around the custom ring I wanted, I quickly planned an engagement session with Rachel, all the while pretending not to remember Rachel’s name so Amanda wouldn’t be suspicious.

At the airport, I was really nervous that the ring box would fall out of my fanny pack, so I was really awkward when it came to pulling out my wallet. Amanda noticed, but I kept playing it off.

Lei and Amanda kiss
Lens: Rachel Rodgers Photography

We stayed with an old Florida friend of Amanda’s in his super cute apartment in Brooklyn. We walked around a ton, a lot of the walking we did with Rachel, before my proposal. I was so nervous, and I don’t think anything could’ve calmed me down.

I also had connected with a client from several years ago who’s a poet. I asked her if she could write a poem for the occasion, and not only did she write a beautiful poem, she also performed it for Amanda and I minutes after my proposal. I was so incredibly special to not only see Kristine again, but to have her write something special for Amanda just lit up my heart.

Kristine Esser Slentz reads custom poem to Lei and Amanda after proposal
Custom poem read by Kristine Esser Slentz

We went to drag bingo after with Kristine and Lincoln, her husband, and we had such a great time. What a way to connect history.

We went to see Hadestown, an incredible show with incredible music, and an outstanding cast, capping out the few days in New York with a lot of highs.

Choosing a custom engagement ring was the only way to go for me. Not only because I live in a custom world, garment-wise, but because my bride to be was very confident about what they wanted, and I wanted more than anything to give her exactly what she wanted.

closeup of engagement ring lying on it's side on a bed of flowers

My wife wanted a dainty band, and while I just said I wanted her to have everything she wanted, I’m also a designer, and wanted the band to have a design as well. I had Petite G create a knife edge that started out wider at the top and tapered down at the bottom. The set in emerald cut diamond has a very vintage engagement ring feel to it with the knife edge. When you look at the ring from the top, it looks like the band is quite petite, but you can tell from the side that there is depth, and in my opinion, depth.

Petite G custom engagement ring

Going custom for my wedding attire was a no brainer, but I realized that a custom engagement ring was going to also save me time, headache, and heartache searching for something that I didn’t know how to describe, and didn’t know where to find- and I looked!

Petite G was so wonderful helping me get my words out to create an engagement ring that I still catch my wife admiring. I would’ve never guessed that a custom engagement ring from a jeweler would have been as affordable as I learned it could be, and we worked to choose the diamond carefully. I knew my wife, a wedding photographer, would be able to see any imperfections, after photographing so many weddings with her macro lens.

Lei and Amanda come out of an embrace and laugh

I never thought about how I was going to propose. I never had youthful dreams of being proposed to, either, so a lot of this was foreign to me. Proposing in New York was such a fun idea, and I highly recommend surprising your sweetie with a destination proposal. Granted, Amanda knew I was going to propose, and we’re a queer couple, so of course we had talked about getting married, and all that unfolds from there. But surprising her was still worth it all!

Lei stands in front of a red wall holding a small bouquet of flowers, laughing. Amanda stands next to them with bouquet in front of their face.

Would I do anything any different? Sure! I would’ve had a band come out of nowhere to play my wife’s favorite song. I would’ve had a choir sing along to the band. I would’ve had fireworks and a whole dance number planned out and rehearsed. Honestly, I chickened out on all of that. Why? I don’t know. But I did. I kept it close. I still think about it.

Lei jumping with hair in their face. Amanda stands looking at them

Besides recommending getting a custom engagement ring, I also recommend hiring a photographer for your proposal. Can you do without one? Absolutely! But if you can swing it, I have to say that I look at our engagement gallery a lot. It was a whirlwind day, and having these pictures takes me right back to those moments.

Thank you Kristine for the beautiful poem. And thank you to Rachel for this beautiful gallery.

Lei proposing to Amanda. Amanda has a hand over her mouth
Lei and Amanda kiss
Lei and Amanda come out of an embrace and laugh
Lei jumping with hair in their face. Amanda stands looking at them
Lei stands in front of a red wall holding a small bouquet of flowers, laughing. Amanda stands next to them with bouquet in front of their face.
Engagement ring shot from top
Petite G custom engagement ring
Petite G custom ring with pink rose
closeup of engagement ring lying on it's side on a bed of flowers

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